tetelestai

"everybodyduck" is my favorite band, and this is one of my favorite "everybodyduck" songs ever. i really thought i had already posted it on my blog, but i searched for it earlier today and couldn't find it. so i'm posting it now. the lyrics convey very well how much God loves us...

Have you ever felt like no one really loved you
Well, Lord, these days that's just exactly how I feel
I'm just so plain next to these shining stars around me
And in my loneliness before You now I kneel

I see Your failure every morning in the mirror
confirming unkind words that I try to ignore
and I know all the sins inside that no one else sees
I feel so worthless, Lord, can't see what I'm here for

chorus:
When there's no love, I have You, Lord
before the earth was formed Your plan for me You knew
and in this day when something's worth is based on
what someone would pay
it's nice to know I'm worth one Jesus to you
it's nice to know I'm worth one Jesus to you

I can't quite understand how one like You could love me
with every sin I know I'm not a pretty sight
yet I can't count the times You wrapped Your arms around me
despite the blackness of my heart You held me tight

You knew all along that I could never buy my freedom
the price for all my sin was more than I could bear
You sent Your only Son as payment for my burden
a perfect sacrifice for all mankind to share

chorus

So when I feel this life of mine has no real value
and there's no one who'd care if I should live or die
I remember just how much You gave to have me
You paid so much for something no one else would buy.

everybodyduck
tetelestai

get in the plate

Pastor Bob (senior pastor at 'my' church) has been preaching a series on Stewardship. Today he preached out of 2 Cor. 9. I was reminded of this song and shared it with the high school students in SES (Sunday Evening Study) this evening. Its a fun song, but also serious...chew on it (and 2 Cor. 9 is a good chapter to read too).

As the music starts to play
we mechanically obey
and scrape our scraps off in the plate so God can eat.

10% so very small
most don’t feel it though at all
just a fulfillment of a holy quota we guess we should keep

we believe what God desires is our money
the whole gift of giving we’ve completely missed
and while my solution may at first seem funny
if you truly want to give God what He wants I must insist

get in the plate
blow the ushers mind
when the offering plate is passed just climb in one foot at a time
get in the plate
try something new
Jesus won’t accept your offering until you’ve offered you

we’ll need forklifts in the aisles
just to move the bodies piled
in the offering plate so high it’ll scrape the roof
no one ever will complain
singing [something i can't understand] ....

but this dream world is in [can't understand these lyrics]
do you tithe to ease the guilt you feel inside?
death to self is what the gospel is demanding
so put your patronizing gifts away get in the plate and ride

get in the plate
blow the ushers mind
when the offering plate is passed just climb in one foot at a time
get in the plate
try something new
Jesus won’t accept your offering until you’ve offered you

we believe what God desires is our money
the whole gift of giving we’ve completely missed
and while my solution may at first seem funny
if you truly want to give God what He wants I must insist

get in the plate
blow the ushers mind
when the offering plate is passed just climb in one foot at a time
get in the plate
try something new
Jesus won’t accept your offering until you’ve offered you

“Get in the Plate”
Everybodyduck

desire

for the last couple years or so i've considered myself a "Christian Hedonist". some people who are older than me find that term offensive or crude. i don't really blame them. in the past the term "hedonist" was used a lot and understood to relate to people who sought sexual pleasure at any cost. the true definition of the term is simply "a person whose life is devoted to the pursuit of pleasure and self-gratification" (dictionary.com). so, it's not strictly related to sexual pleasure, instead it's the general pursuit of pleasure.

the duo of Sam Storms ("one thing" and "pleasures evermore") and John Piper (mostly his sermon "Quest: Joy; Found: Christ") convinced me of the truth of Christian Hedonism. Basically it's based on the observation that all people pursue pleasure. all people. no matter who you are. ultimately, the thing you are pursuing is pleasure. that's how we are wired. you can try to deny it, but the reason you'd try to deny that you seek pleasure is so that you can be humble, perhaps because God called you to be humble. and why do we humble ourselves? because we are following Him. and why do we follow Him? so that we can enter His presence for eternity. and Psalm 16:11 tells us that in His presence is fullness of joy, at His right hand are pleasures evermore (see also James 4:10).

even in Matthew 16 where Christ tells us to deny ourselves...denying yourself is NOT the ultimate goal. look at the passage again. the ultimate goal is to find your life, to preserve your life, to have eternal life. which, again, ends in pleasures evermore.

I also see it ALL over the Scriptures. Most notably Psalm 119. I love Psalm 119. William Wilberforce had this Psalm memorized (all 176 verses) and would recite it as he walked to and from work. I want the same attitude this psalmist had.

Recently I was introduced to Jimmy Needham. An amazing musician with a HEART (desire) for Christ. His songs are amazing and chock-full of allusions to Scripture. Check out the first verse to his song "For Freedom" (itself an allusion to Gal. 5:1)

oh to be
delighted by You
and to see
the colors of
Your Train
and to be
freed by You
it would be
it would be
it would be
my claim to fame
so rejoice my friend
because my friend
you've got a Friend indeed
yeaaaha....
it is for freedom He set us free.

Jimmy Needham
"For Freedom"

"oh to be, delighted by You" is my desire. my hope. my aim. as i grow, i am more and more convinced that the more i fall in love with Christ, the more i am delighted by Him, the more i find my pleasure in Him...then i will realize how pale and even putrid sin is. often times sin looks good to us. but, as Sam Storms says in his book "Pleasures Evermore", "Sin becomes ugly and is subject to defeat only when viewed in light of Christ's beauty."

my desire is to fall in love with Christ. to find my pleasure in Him.

look how beautiful our God is...

"the colors of Your train" is an allusion to Isaiah 6 where we see "the train of His robe filling the temple", a magnificent picture of our God. the colors would be a picture of the beauty and multifaceted-ness (that's a word, right?) of God's glory. A train is a picture of royalty. The bigger a king's train, the more majestic and royal he is. Our God's train FILLS the temple. not just any temple. this is the temple in Heaven, the temple of the one, true, Creator God! His train is HUGE, a picture of His superior royalty and grandeur.

He is worthy. i pray that i would be delighted by Him, that i would open my eyes to see Him. and when i see Him as He truly is...how can i not respond by pursuing Him with everything i have?

mystery

i am amazed and stunned at the mystery of how God weaves and works and places and prods all of us in His perfect way and timing to create a world filled with sinners and saints whom He uses to bring glory to Himself...God loves turning rebels into worshipers...God loves turning sinners into saints...and He gets the glory in it all...

here in the quiet speak to me now
my ears are open to
Your gentle sweet whispering
break down the door, come inside
shine down Your bright light
i need a lamp for my feet, yeah i need a lamp for my feet

refrain
i want to hear the thunder of who You are
to be captured inside the wonder of who You are
i want to live i want to breathe
to search out Your heart and all of Your mysteries

You were the first and You’ll be the end
time cannot hold You down
so, why save a wretch like me?
no eye has seen, no ear has heard
no heart could fully know
all of Your mystery

Your glory burns in the stars
shine down your light let it burn in my heart
bring me to glory, bring me to You
Lord it’s your heart that i will hold onto

Your glory burns in the stars
shine down Your light let me know who You are
Jesus, Your glory burns in the stars
shine down Your light, let me see You, let me see You

mystery
phil wickham

Paul cries out in Philippians "I count all things to be loss in view of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them but rubbish so that I may gain Christ, and may be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own derived from the Law, but that which is through faith in Christ, the righteousness which comes from God on the basis of faith, that I may know Him!"

and the Psalmist in Psalm 27 sings, "One thing I have asked from the LORD, that I shall seek:
That I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life,
To behold the beauty of the LORD
And to meditate in His temple."

O, that i, too, might KNOW Him. not simply facts and head knowledge. But a true relationship with Him. An intimate knowledge of Him. Based in truth and pervading and invading every area of my life and being. I have seen His mystery and I want to dive deeper into it. O, that my passion might be single: Christ and all He is. that i might be focused on seeking His presence, His throne, His temple. Meditating on who He is and who I was and who I am because of Him and all He has done for ......me? yes...He loves me that much! why should i not seek Him? why do i not more passionately seek and pursue Him?

from the inside out

have you heard this song??

a thousand times i've failed
still Your mercy remains and should i stumble again
still i'm caught in Your grace
everlasting
Your light will shine when all else fades
never ending
Your glory goes beyond all fame

Your will above all else
my purpose remains
the art of losing myself
in bringing You praise
everlasting
Your light will shine when all else fades
never ending
Your glory goes beyond all fame

in my heart and my soul
Lord i give You control
consume me from the inside out
Lord let justice and praise
become my embrace
to love You from the inside out

everlasting
Your light will shine when all else fades
never ending
Your glory goes beyond all fame
and the cry of my heart
is to bring You praise
from the inside out
Lord my soul cries out

From The Inside Out
by Hillsong United
album: United We Stand (2006)

don rockholt

i didn't know him well. i spoke with him and his wife only a handful of times at church. but i respect him much. and i learned much from him. Don had been struggling with cancer for the past several years. For a little while we thought he had beaten it, but Don passed away on the evening of November 3rd.

he affected me because i saw the struggle and the pain he was going through. yet he would still do special music every once in a while (don has an amazing voice and loves to sing), and as he sang i saw a joy in him in the midst of trouble. Pastor Ray met weekly with Don; they were prayer partners. Pastor Ray would share certain things with me that Don had done or said. As Don headed downhill health-wise Pastor Ray would ask him how he was doing. Don would always respond "Well, I don't know about you, but I'm still on Plan A." Plan A was living each day for God...and why would that change?

Don lived on Plan A each day when he could almost reach out and touch the end of his days. He lived on Plan A in the midst of trials and struggles.

In my life...am I living on Plan A every day? I cannot see the end of my days. I am in good health. When struggles come my way am I still living on Plan A no matter what?

I hope so.

At Don's funeral his nephews sang the following song. It was originally written as a poem (and then became a hymn) by Fanny Crosby. But I've only heard the Rich Mullins version...and they sang it a lot like he did. It's a powerful song:

All The Way My Savior Leads Me
All the way my Savior leads me-
What have I to ask beside?
Can I doubt His tender mercy,
Who through life has been my guide?
Heavenly peace, divinest comfort,
Here by faith in Him to dwell!
For I know, whate'er befall me,
Jesus doeth all things well;
For I know, whate'er befall me,
Jesus doeth all things well.

All the way my Savior leads me-
Cheers each winding path I tread,
Gives me grace for every trial,
Feeds me with the living bread.
Though my weary steps may falter
And my soul a-thirst may be,
Gushing from the Rock before me,
Lo! a spring of joy I see;
Gushing from the Rock before me,
Lo! a spring of joy I see.

All the way my Savior leads me-
O the fullness of His love!
Perfect rest to me is promised
In my Father's house above.
When my spirit, clothed immortal,
Wings its flight to realms of day,
This my song through endless ages:
Jesus led me all the day;
This my song through endless ages:
Jesus led me all the way.

if i stand

here's some lyrics to a great song by Rich Mullins. i love the chorus:

If I Stand
There's more that rises in the morning
Than the sun
And more that shines in the night
Than just the moon
It's more than just this fire here
That keeps me warm
In a shelter that is larger
Than this room

And there's a loyalty that's deeper
Than mere sentiments
And a music higher than the songs
That I can sing
The stuff of Earth competes
For the allegiance
I owe only to the Giver
Of all good things

CHORUS:
So if I stand let me stand on the promise
That You will pull me through
And if I can't, let me fall on the grace
That first brought me to You
And if I sing let me sing for the joy
That has born in me these songs
And if I weep let it be as a man
Who is longing for his home

There's more that dances on the prairies
Than the wind
More that pulses in the ocean
Than the tide
There's a love that is fiercer
Than the love between friends
More gentle than a mother's
When her baby's at her side

And there's a loyalty that's deeper
Than mere sentiments
And a music higher than the songs
That I can sing
The stuff of Earth competes
For the allegence
I owe only to the Giver
Of all good things

CHORUS(2x)

And if I weep let it be as a man
Who is longing for his home

superpowers

ah...back in the day I was a true FIF fan!

If you don't/didn't know who FIF is (actually, was), you missed out.
They had MANY dedicated fans and always put on an amazing, fun show.

I was proud to claim that I made it to two of their concerts in less than 24hrs one time!

I was feeling nostalgic the other day and put on their live album "Proof that the youth are revolting". It was great. I sang along, danced and laughed at their crazy songs. But I also wanted to share these lyrics with you. They're from FIF's song called "Superpowers":

don't want to rock the mic
don't want to meet the pope
i just want to share with you
how we got this peace and hope

yeah, there's a lot more to the song than that, but i love the sentiment there. ya know, popular bands may get to meet the pope someday (if I remember correctly the Supertones got to play for some event the pope was at...now, I loved the supertones too, so i'm not saying they're no good for meeting the pope...it's just an example.). but really, who cares about meeting the pope? sure, he's popular all over the world, but he's human (uh...not to mention he's the leader of a cult that blinds so many people to the true gospel of GRACE...see this website). and who cares about rocking the mic...FIF was saying that what they really want to do is communicate to us how they got the peace and hope they have in their lives. the peace and hope that only comes from personally knowing Jesus Christ as Savior of your life!

that's what it's all about.

There is a Fountain

for some reason this old hymn came to me today.
what amazing words...

There Is a Fountain
by Will­iam Cow­per

1
There is a fountain filled with blood
drawn from Emmanuel's veins;
and sinners plunged beneath that flood
lose all their guilty stains.
Lose all their guilty stains,
lose all their guilty stains;
and sinners plunged beneath that flood
lose all their guilty stains.

2
The dying thief rejoiced to see
that fountain in his day;
and there may I, though vile as he,
wash all my sins away.
Wash all my sins away,
wash all my sins away;
and there may I, though vile as he,
wash all my sins away.

3
Dear dying Lamb, Thy precious blood
shall never lose its pow'r
till all the ransomed church of God
be saved, to sin no more.
Be saved, to sin no more,
be saved, to sin no more;
till all the ransomed church of God
be saved, to sin no more.

4
E'er since, by faith, I saw the stream
Thy flowing wounds supply,
redeeming love has been my theme,
and shall be till I die.
And shall be till I die,
and shall be till I die;
redeeming love has been my theme,
and shall be till I die.

5
Lord, I believe Thou hast prepared,
Unworthy though I be,
For me a blood-bought, free reward
A golden harp for me!
A golden harp for me!
A golden harp for me!
For me a blood-bought, free reward
A golden harp for me!

6
’Tis strung, and tuned, for endless years,
And formed by pow’r divine;
To sound, in God the Father’s ears,
No other name but Thine.
No other name but Thine.
No other name but Thine.
To sound, in God the Father’s ears,
No other name but Thine.

7
There in a nobler, sweeter song,
I'll sing thy power to save,
when this poor lisping, stamm'ring tongue
Is ransomed from the grave,
Is ransomed from the grave,
Is ransomed from the grave,
when this poor lisping, stamm'ring tongue
Is ransomed from the grave.

hope

deepest oceans of despair
this vast and somber
charcoal night of space
have you given up yet?

your hope lingers
in the crevices and corners of your soul
i know you
you haven't given up yet

you are brave in this darkness, saint saturn
sometimes the bravest thing of all
is to hope


...sometimes the bravest thing of all
is to hope

~Brave Saint Saturn - "Atropos"

first love

When I think of all I’ve seen
Nothing compares
to what You give
And to drink of what You bring
You quench the thirst
for me to live
I am satisfied by what
tenderness You’ve shown
to me
and I empty all that I am

And You fill
my life
You’re everything to me
And there’s nothing else I need anymore
And I know You
are everything to me
And there’s nothing else I need anymore

I have tasted and I know
this fire birthed inside
will only grow
And I’ve sought all that this world
tried to offer me
and it lead me to Your feet
And I empty all that I am

And You fill
my life
You’re everything to me
And there’s nothing else I need anymore
And I know You
are everything to me
And there’s nothing else I need anymore

I will lay down all my needs
and You will come and make them new
to make You my only desire
my desire

And You fill
my life
You’re everything to me
everything to me
And You fill my life
You’re everything to me
And there’s nothing else I need anymore
And I know You
are everything to me
And there’s nothing else I need anymore
There’s nothing else I need...
~Jeremy Camp - "Nothing Else I Need"

I like that idea: empty all you are and He will fill you.
God needs to be our first love. He needs to be the source from where we obtain our joy and our fulfillment.

A student was talking to me tonight about video games and he mentioned that one game he has been playing a lot has been getting boring. I pointed out the fact that we need to make God the source of our joy because He is infinite. He is never-ending. We can find out 10,000 new things about God every day and after a thousand years we will not have begun to exhaust the vastness of His character. There will forever be more aspects and facets and attributes of God to discover. Video games are finite, everything besides God is finite and thus will only satisfy us for as long as it takes us to explore that thing fully. Then we will no longer be satisfied and will desire more...something else. Desire God! Be satisfied in Him! He is everything you need! He needs to be our one desire, our goal, our first love.

te agrada a ti

if you don't understan spanish...sorry.
but this is a song by a guy who did the music at Hume Lake this weekend. He sang it in spanish and then in english. i love the spanish language and wanted to share the words with you (if you speak spanish). the reason i'm not putting them in english is 'cause i think the spanish version is so much more powerful (even though the english is a translation of the same words). here it is:

hoy vengo at Ti
mis derechos a rendir
mi vida Te doy
como un regalo para Ti
como El que Tu me diste a mi

tal vez nada pasara
tal vez nadie cambiara
tal vez ni una piedra movera

pero te agrada a Ti
te agrada a Ti
te agrada a Ti

"Te agrada a Ti/It pleases You"
Moi - Moises Navarro
----------
So many times I do things with the intention of making a difference or changing lives or moving mountains, and if none of those things happen, I feel I have failed. But I have not failed so long as He was pleased.

Or I might do things with my own pleasure in mind. Then I have failed. We need to be doing things, all things, because it pleases Him.

O LORD, let me seek Your glory. Your pleasure. May I do things because it pleases You.

New Year's

It's New Years Eve and I'm full of empty promises,
I half pretend to keep this time, just like last year.
The band is loud and I'm wandering the shadows,
wishing I was never here.
I persevere.
A crowded room, these whitewashed tombs,
they raise their glasses high, they kiss the past goodbye.

This New Years Eve, I'm waiting for tomorrow.
My heart is on my sleeve,
and yes I still believe, this New Years Eve,
will turn out better than before,
I'm holding on, still holding out,
until they close the door...on me.

It's New Years Eve and I feel my insecurities,
are haunting me like ghosts, this sinking quicksand.
And then with thunderous praise and lofty adoration,
a second passes by, yet nothing changes.
I hate my skin, this grave I'm standing in.
Another change of years, and I wish I wasn't here.

A year goes by and I'm staring at my watch again,
and I dig deep this time,
for something greater than I've ever been,
life to ancient wineskins.
And I was blind but now I see.

This New Years Eve, something must change me inside,
I'm crooked and misguided, and tired of being tired.
This New Years Eve, I'm waiting for tomorrow.
My heart is on my sleeve, and yes I still believe, in You.

~Five Iron Frenzy - "New Year's Eve"
------------------------

ever make a new year's resolution but can't keep it? it's 'cause change takes place inside. God must change us. let's allow Him to change us this year.

i love that line "a second passes by, yet nothing changes". the calendars may say 2006 instead of 2005, but what's the real difference? It's no different than between now and.........now. No difference between any second and the next. If there's going to be real change it has to take place inside us, in our spirit, in our heart, and only God can do that. We must let Him change us.

Time is not a changer or a healer. Time is only a revealer of how God changes and heals.

as lambs

more lyrics:

YOU send us out as lambs amongst the wolves
but the LION stands by our side
YOU will be my guide
i need YOU to lead me
i am so weak without YOU
i am tired of fighting
i need YOU to fight for me
will YOU be my guide
JESUS
YOUR voice is so sweet in my ears
JESUS
i desire to be close to YOU
fill me with YOUR SPIRIT GOD
YOU'VE given me a sword to kill my enemies
FATHER, take these struggles from me
~haste the day - "as lambs"

when everything falls

I was questioned about lyrics of new bands i've been listening to. not negatively questioned, just questioned. and when i showed the questioner lyrics, they were quite satisfied. i'd like to share some more amazing lyrics with you:

I can see it comin' on the horizon
Sky turning black, it's raining down
Can't move my feet, cannot be shaken
Not movin', I'm standing strong
And I'm standing so firm
I can't be moved

I will stand
I will stand
When everything falls away
I will fight this war forever or until I die
I will stand
I will stand
When everyone falls away
I will fight this war forever or until I die

All these things coming against me
I have the choice to fall or fight
I cannot be moved
You give me the strength
Help me fight, help me fight
I'm standing so firm
I can't be moved
I'm standing so firm
I can't be moved

And I'm standing so firm
On this ground You've sat before me
I'll fight for this with my last breath
I'll fight for this till I die
I can't be moved

~haste the day - 'when everything falls'

these lyrics have been with me recently in situations where i need to overcome sin which i've been working on for a long time. a while ago i was distressed because i have tried so many ways to overcome, but i'm not perfect yet (yay for Phil. 3:21). but when these words come into my head i am encouraged to 'fight this war forever or until i die.'

sustained

Here's the lyrics to an amazing song:

i'm satisfied by Your love so completely
how could i thirst for the praises of man?
there's nothing i need that You haven't provided
and no one can offer me peace like You can

Jesus Your love is enough
sufficient for me
all i have needed You've given for free
Your love is enough
don't need men's applause
i know what i'm worth i remember the cross

i'm sustained oh Lord
when Your light surrounds me the world goes away
i'm sustained oh Lord
my heart knows Your love like it flows through my veins
such peace and contentment i found in Your grace
i can't think why i've ever complained
You love me, what more can i want?
i'm sustained

~everybodyduck - sustained